I think I need to take a short chapter to talk to you, my readers, about something.

It’s going to be like one of Ashwin’s little tangents, but I think it’s important to explain this right about now.

Reading about our lives, you might think it unbelievable that there are so many plural people in them, and so few singlets. Especially with how we tell our stories in these books.

But, for us, it is really like this.

Like people tend to find like, whenever they can. And, even if you’re autistic, if you’re ever remotely social and get out somehow to meet more people – it might just be over the internet but that counts too – you will find your life filling up with people who tend to think like you. And that’s not just politics, but also gender, orientation, and neurotypes.

Autistic people know each other.

ADHD people know each other.

Queer people know each other.

Trans people know each other.

Plural systems know each other.

The list goes on and on. Humans, and human-like people, form groups. It’s what we do.

And seriously, plurality is not as rare as you think. Studies show that DID alone, the most severely pathologized form of it, is thought to make up 0.5% to 1.5% of the population. Even if it’s just 0.1%, that’s a lot of people. 

One in one thousand means that there are at least 600 people in Portland proper that have DID, and that doesn’t include any other forms of plurality. And it’s more likely to be 9,000 people or more. Counting OSDD and non-disorder forms of plurality, the number grows even larger. And that’s just actual Portland, not the greater metro area.

And we usually have to hide our plurality most places we go, because the general public doesn’t accept it. Just like being queer or autistic.

There are still a lot of exceptions, safe places, places where you can talk about really weird experiences you’re having, and no one blinks or questions you. Like Aunti Zero’s. Or certain internet forums.

And we tend to gravitate to those places, because once we find them we stick around. They’re safe.

And then, before you know it, you’ve got three autistic, transgender plural systems meeting weekly in your lobby and talking loudly about it.

And the rest of the U.S. populace has no clue that’s going on, because they’re scared away by the pride flags, or they’ve already found their people and don’t even think to look for another coffee shop, or church, or whatever. The same probably goes for most of the rest of the world.

Weird people come in squads. It’s human instinct, and just a pragmatic matter of safety and social health.

But I want you to know, I am still floored to have seen so clearly that my Mom is plural.

I still don’t know what to make of it.

Before I received my gift from Phage, I would speculate about different people, and wonder if they were maybe plural, too. Sometimes I’d learn if I was right. But I’d always tell myself never to actually assume, and never to tell anyone that I thought they were plural.

It never seemed like the right or safe thing to do. It seemed rude at the very least. Which is why I still kept my mouth shut when I saw my mom’s system members shifting about.

I’ve been through this kind of thing with being autistic and trans, too. Talk to anyone of these three identities, and you’ll almost certainly get the same answers more often than not.

But now that I can confirm this one aspect about someone as tangibly as I can name their eye or hair color, or name the brands of clothing they’re wearing, I really don’t know what to do about it.

I guess if we keep encountering other systems unexpectedly, I’ll have to figure it out.

I just don’t know if I can keep my awareness from showing on our face. But maybe I’ll get used to it.

Anyway, we know that Autism, at least, has a strong genetic component and sometimes tends to run in families.

And, perhaps because of that, and how gender variance runs so strongly in autistic people, or maybe because of its own thing, there are a lot of families with multiple trans people in them, too.

It shouldn’t be too surprising, if you accept that plurality isn’t just caused by trauma, to think that there might be a type of plurality that can run in families due to genetics or something like it. Or maybe it’s just generational trauma. Or Autism.

I want to be clear. I’m not suggesting that anyone would be able to breed for it, or try to weed it out of the human genome, say, by using eugenics.

It’s already been shown that that doesn’t work for Autism or queerness.

A genetic component doesn’t mean it’s 100% hereditary, just that it’s possible in some cases. And trying to get rid of any neurotype or identity would be evil.

Life is more complex than that, anyway.

And it should be.